Basically, the 5 love languages are 5 different ways that someone is loved/shows love to someone else. Here are the 5 love languages:
- Words of Affirmation
- This language uses words to affirm other people
- Acts of Service
- For these people, actions speak louder than words
- Receiving Gifts
- For some people, what makes them feel most loved is to receive a gift
- Quality Time
- This language is all about giving the other person your undivided attention
- Physical Touch
- To this person, nothing speaks more deeply than appropriate touch
- Words of Affirmation
- Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important— hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. You thrive on hearing kind and encouraging words that build you up.
- Quality Time
- In Quality Time, nothing says “I love you” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes you feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed activities, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful. Whether itʼs spending uninterrupted time talking with someone else or doing activities together, you deepen your connection with others through sharing time.
- Physical Touch
- A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, and thoughtful touches on the arm—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive. Appropriate and timely touches communicate warmth, safety, and love to you.
- Acts of Service
- Can helping with homework really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most wants to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter. When others serve you out of love (and not obligation), you feel truly valued and loved.
- Receiving Gifts
- Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures. Gifts are heartfelt symbols to you of someone else's love and affection for you.
I love how in-depth each section is. If you were to purchase a book, there are chapters devoted to each language.
Words of Affirmation makes the absolute most sense for being my number 1. I am extremely sensitive, and I remember every little negative thing that is said. You know how people say it takes 7 compliments to make someone forget a negative statement? Totally not how my brain works. I could get nothing but compliments for 100 years, and I would still remember that one negative comment from 101 years ago. Sometimes I'm okay, and I forget, but I will remember the meanest stuff at the most random times. What people say mean everything to me, but I'm slowly learning to not get so worked up over things like that. When someone does compliment me, my reaction is sincere, and it makes me feel absolutely wonderful. What makes me laugh, is I am super awkward at receiving compliments. I never know if I should just thank them, or if I need to compliment back. But I love them so much.
Quality Time means a lot to me. I would rather sit in a room with someone I love, doing nothing, than go out on the town with acquaintances. When I was away at school, I often felt as if I were annoying my friends, because I just wanted to spend so much time with the same people. I feel really special when someone wants to spend time with me. It really is the little things that make me the happiest. I don't need to go out and have a lot of money spent on me to feel special.
Physical Touch is so big with me. The only thing with physical touch is it has to be from someone I love. Let's be honest: there are certain people I find annoying, or I just don't like. If that person were to touch me, I wouldn't like it. But if someone who is special to me gives me a hug, or just touches my arm or something as we're talking, I love it. I love it so much more if the person hates physical touch (and said person initiates the touch). It seriously just takes touching my arm while we're talking to make me feel loved.
Acts of Service is really nice, but not that important for me. I hate asking people for anything, so I feel really weird if someone does something for me. I'm actually working through this right now with inviting people to try Shaklee, because some of my fears are so deeply rooted in something like this, that I freak out every time I even think about asking someone for help with something. Maybe in the future this will have a higher score.
Receiving Gifts is a tough one for me. I LOVE giving gifts, but I don't really like receiving them. Let me clarify: I LOVE when someone has taken the time to make or buy me something, but then I feel bad that they spent so much time/money/energy on something for me. I would rather have a note than a gift, to be honest. And, yes, receiving gifts for special occasions is okay, but I don't know. I still think I would rather have a note or something.
What order are your love languages? Let me know! I would love to chat more with you!!
XOXO
Jen
No comments:
Post a Comment